You Still Have 3 Minutes….
Posted on 05. Dec, 2011 by Susan in Blog, Inspiration
Gather round, team. We’re about to learn a lesson via football analogy and a 13-year-old honey badger.
My son Ryan is struggling with seventh grade algebra. He has a D. Now, he has this grade not because he’s bad at math. He has this grade, because for the first time in his school career, he has to actually study to get a good grade. Imagine! Studying to get the grades you want!
And, the grade isn’t what’s winding me up. It’s not so much about him getting the A as it is about him trying and learning.
With three weeks left in the grading period, my little man has announced that he’ll just “start over” next quarter. Clearly, in his mind, it’s too late to do anything about it now. I was doing my best not to go all “southern mama meets Bon Qui Qui” on him, but the boy is a .5 away from a C!
When I heard this, I knew it was time to pull out the big guns – which, when you’re dealing with this particular teenage boy – are football analogies. Ryan is a fierce middle line backer, so I asked him if he’d walk off the field during a game, if there were three minutes left.
No way! Absolutely not. Kah-ray-zee cray cray talk.
Why? Because a lot can happen in three minutes in a football game.
Right? Right.
It’s December. With all the parties and the cookies and a million obligations, a lot of us will walk off of the field during the holidays.
Don’t.
There are three minutes left in the game and you deserve to play hard until the clock runs out. Leave it all on the field.
Smaller brains + bigger butts: the problem with your ‘practicality’
Posted on 28. Oct, 2011 by Susan in Blog, Inspiration, Weight Loss
The difference between letting yourself be and letting yourself go
The line between self-acceptance and self abuse
The line between loving yourself and losing yourself
Is it self acceptance… or self abuse?
Are you happy with your body? Or just ignoring it?
STOP hiding and ignoring your body!
The BIG mistake no-nonsense women make
–
No-nonsense women, I’m calling you out.
You know who you are.
You’re ‘too smart’ to fret about your weight. You’re ‘too busy’ to worry about the food you’re eating. You have too much ‘real work’ to do to concern yourself with health nut nonsense. Green smoothies and jogging are for “pool moms” with too much free time.
Well I have news for you, hon: you’re not doing yourself any favors.
You may think you’re liberated because you’ve put aside the skinny jean fixation plaguing so many women nowadays.
But there’s a difference between weight loss and weight love, body image and body love.
By all means: embrace your body. Love yourself no matter what the scale says. But don’t let those ideals become an excuse for neglecting your health.
Ignoring energizing foods, not moving your body, eating more than you need to and continuing unhealthy habits are what’s keeping those extra pounds in place.
Refusing to change is self-abuse, not self-acceptance.
I know, being a working chic is tough. But when you ignore your body and its signals, you’re keeping yourself from your best performance. Too many cups of coffee and sugary snacks leads to crashes later in the day. ‘Grazing’ out of boredom or procrastination is shrinking your brain capacity and expanding your waistline.
Americans spend an average of $33 billion dollars a year on weight loss products and services… yet 40% of the population says they never engage in physical activity in their leisure time. *
See the disconnect?
If you’re carrying around extra weight, don’t just defend it because you disagree with society’s starving-skinny obsession.
Instead, turn within. Put your body in charge. Quiet your mind, listen, notice its signals.
By paying close attention to what your body truly needs, you can make the loving, lasting changes that’ll keep you healthy.
These changes won’t just bring your weight down. Healthy eating and body awareness goes beyond improving your appearance. When your body is properly nourished, your focus improves. You have more energy and you can connect more deeply with your loved ones, your work and yourself.
I discussed some easy tips for healthier living with the lovely Stefanie Martinez on Local 7 News! Go ahead, take a look:
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Your body knows what it needs. Listen. It won’t lead you astray.
*(Source: http://www.ideafit.com/fitness-library/fast-factsobesity-amp-overweight-statisticsmdashthe-supersizing-epidemic-of-america)
Love Yourself Healthy
Posted on 24. Aug, 2011 by Susan in Blog, Inspiration, Motivation, Weight Loss
I live in the “Fattest City in America!” Think I’m kidding? Check out this Gallup Poll that ranked Evansville, Indiana as the heftiest American city with the over 37% of our population weighing in as obese.
I’m turning my attention and my mojo to my hometown. But, this isn’t just a local issue. Watch my video series below if you’d like to learn how to LOVE YOURSELF HEALTHY.
Be Your Own Statue of Liberty
Posted on 07. Apr, 2010 by Susan in Inspiration
I was lucky enough to plan and spend Spring Break vacation in New York City with my family. (Say it with me using the Southern accent from the old Pace Thick N Chunky salsa commercial. Remember that one? Of course.) The trip experiences reminded me of the Anais Nin quote, “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.” Lately, all I see is a gift. And, by gift, I’m including but not really meaning, my giant new purse I bought the day before the trip to haul around maps, sunglasses, water bottles and other vacation necessities like four shades of lip gloss. I digress.
When I walked through the doors of Ellis Island and imagined my ancestors pulling their trunks across that very floor, I cried. How far they travelled, how far I’ve come.
I cried when I saw the Statue of Liberty from the ferry. How many immigrants looked to her as the physical sign that their new life was possible? The relief that one feels when we believe all is possible. Now.
The Broadway musical Wicked was amazing. I cried watching the talent, creativity and unparalleled magic present on that stage. Defying Gravity. I cried some more when as I watched my daughter scoot forward in her seat, eyes wide, jaw dropped in complete wonder.
So if you care to find me
Look to the western sky!
As someone told me lately:
“Ev’ryone deserves the chance to fly!”
And if I’m flying solo
At least I’m flying free
To those who’d ground me
Take a message back from me
Tell them how I am
Defying gravity
I soaked up seven days walking the streets of a city built by immigrants from every country. All striking out to create their way. I could feel their bootstrapping spirit driving the pulse of the city, “It’s all possible. Come on. Let’s go.”
Because I have been diagnosed with Wanderlust, and plenty of other things that we shall not discuss here, I tried to convince my family to relocate to NYC. Since that went over about as well as Ryan’s suggestion that we breed ferrets and have our very own Ferret Nation in the basement, I decided to bring NYC home with me.
1. Remember Your Ellis Island
We’ve all come all a long way. Instead of using the negative circumstances in your past as reasons for your misery, pat yourself on the back for living through them. What have you overcome? You are not a victim or a survivor. You are something more than that. A creator. A thriver. An architect of your life. Look at your amazing life story. Remember where you were, and how far you have come. Wow.
2. Be Your Own Statue of Liberty
Symbols of hope are nice for reflection, but nothing beats creating your own conviction. What are you a symbol of? What do you stand for? What are you reflecting to others? For example, if I had one thing to say to my tribe, it would be this:
You can create whatever you want, and it’s all possible.
What would you say?
3. Create Wicked Inspiration
There’s nothing that keeps the fire and passion for life flaming like creative inspiration. We can lose our zest when we forget to play. Create your own Inspiration Junction with this free worksheet. Get inspired. Stay laughing.
And, if you want to sing along with me, go to iTunes and download Defying Gravity here and rock it out. I can’t wait to hear what you create.
Footless Dolls Can Still Be Loved
Posted on 11. Dec, 2009 by Susan in Inspiration
I really hate it when a doll loses a foot.
You guys know that I am holiday fanatic. I know this is no surprise. I’ve seriously cleaned up all of my Holiday Psycho Woman past stuff, and have a blast during the holidays. That doesn’t mean that everything happens perfectly for me during the holidays. Don’t even get me started on my Dysfunctional Family Bingo Results from Thanksgiving, or how many gifts my beagle Jake has confused as “his toy.”
What’s cool about the season for me now, is my thinking. Clean thinking keeps me calm and centered and happy regardless of negative circumstances that arise. And, when my thinking is clean, I am clear about what I like, and what does not work for me. And from that place, it’s easy to create a holiday season that is authentic.
So, even though yesterday Jake chewed the foot off of a very pretty and unsuspecting doll that was wrapped under the tree for Emily, and even though I attended a party that is not my favorite kind of gathering (because my seriously extroverted husband really wanted me to go with him), it was an awesome day. I chose to be in “the Christmas spirit.” I chose it. Despite the footless doll.
I’ve talked to a lot of people who tell me that they “just aren’t feeling” it this year. Guess what? Holiday Magic is not going to pull up in your driveway and honk three times to get your attention. You have to create it. Despite how much money is in the bank. Despite how much you want to punch your boss. Despite the fact that your son married a life coach. You can be intentional with your thoughts and create holiday cheer. You can. Yes. You.
I’ve got this simple little tool called “The Happy Basket” that sounds lame but really works. It will help you turn toward what you love about the Holiday Season. You can listen to a short two-minute explanation of the tool by clicking here, on the ipod image on my homepage. Then, you can “Holiday Happy Basket” by clicking here to download the free worksheet.
The wise gurus say that life gives you your greatest teachers in your very own home. I believe that. As I was cleaning up the chewed up wrapping paper and doll parts off of the living room floor last night, Emily said, “She’s still beautiful, Mom.” No, this little doll was not headed to the “Island of Misfit Toys.” She was redressed and taken immediately up to Emily’s room. She is loved.
And so are you. Merry Christmas.
Do You Hear What I Hear?
Posted on 07. Dec, 2009 by Susan in Inspiration
Step away from the Black Friday and Cyber Monday super saver sales. What do you really want this holiday season? Super cool brown clover boots from Anthropologie aside, what do you crave? What feeling state are you hoping to get from what you want? 
Almost everyone claims happiness, connection, love, peace. Okay, I get that you want the boots too, but stay with me here for a minute. Because, as much as you want those boots, you aren’t going to get the deeper things that you really want from them (even the clover ones).
Working with hundreds of clients to help them manage the holidays, it’s comical what we get wrapped up in, sometimes literally, during the holidays. The decorating, cooking, eating, mailing, shopping, partying, baking, wrapping, stamping, color coordinating hysteria. These are all fine things to do as long as it feels happy while you are doing them. As long as you aren’t crying while you wrap that 500th gift to someone you barely know. As long as you aren’t eating when you aren’t hungry to stuff down disappointment. As long as you aren’t baking with bitterness. (Bitter baking just sucks.)
During this season, notice yourself. Notice if you are feeling tired or cranky. Notice if you are doing things that you do not want to do. Notice if you would rather just get it all over with. And, then, ask yourself WHY?. Listen for the answer.
And then, ask yourself how you can better create what you are really after: connection, happiness, peace, joy. What could you stop doing? What could you think? What would feel more like love and peace and joy than what you are currently thinking and doing?
My biggest hope for you is that you are living your life as a thank you. A big, loud, jingle jangle THANK YOU. Palms up, smiling, embracing your life.
And maybe also wearing those Clover boots.
My Past As A Holiday Psycho Woman
Posted on 14. Nov, 2009 by Susan in Inspiration
I once spent so much money with Lands End during the holidays that the company sent me a cashmere blanket and a box of chocolates as a “thank you.” My name is Susan Hyatt, and I am a recovered holiday psycho woman.
How you do one thing is how you do EVERYTHING. Unfortunately, how I “did” the holidays five years ago, was over the top, manic, and based almost entirely on the shiny. Shiny gifts, shiny ornaments, shiny windows, shiny catering for a shiny party, shiny holiday portraits, shiny china, shiny holiday newsletters. The glare was too much.
Sure, there were moments of authenticity and fun. But those moments were outnumbered by the crazy moments. Like the time that I tried to make a homemade gingerbread house with my kids, didn’t follow the directions, and it fell apart and onto the floor, along with our moods. Good times.
I’ve learned how to rethink and redesign the holidays, by learning how to think. I even created a really handy workbook and short video coaching download on the topic. And, this year, I’ve teamed up with my coaching colleague and Master Certified Mind Body Expert, Abigail Steidley, to talk about ways to create a meaningful and nourishing holiday season. We will not be talking about things like setting egg timers so that you can race from room to room and get more crap done. I took that class and have a frenzied wrapping paper story to tell you about during class. It wasn’t pretty.
We will be talking about the art of becoming who you want to be, during a holiday season that you want to have, by doing less physically and mentally. Cause believe you me, even when I wasn’t setting egg timers to “efficiently” wrap gifts and bark at my kids, I was sitting around THINKING and OBSESSING about things like stocking stuffers and reindeer food. Exhausting.
What I wish for you this holiday season is to ditch drama, exhaustion, and over commitment. I know first hand this creates a holiday that is unfulfilling, debt ridden, and a whole lot of work. Defeats the purpose of “holiday.”
Read what Abigail has to say here. It’s pretty cool. And join us for a four-week group telecourse that will show you how to easily create what you want. Instead of a shiny holiday, I have one that authentically GLOWS.
I Choose Innovate Over Replicate
Posted on 25. Sep, 2009 by Susan in Inspiration
“So, you want me to change my thoughts and think that it is OK for my psycho boss to treat me like dirt?”
I get comments like this all the time from clients who are brand new to
thought work. Changing your thoughts does not mean that you become a
wimp. It does not mean that you trick yourself into believing that a
negative circumstance is all peachy and fresh as summer sunshine. It
means that you do not BECOME the negative situation, as my mentor Brooke Castillo would say.
A personal example…
Last night I was surfing the Internet. I found a program called Copyscape.
For free, it allows you to enter your web site address into a search
window, and it will scrub the net and report back to you within seconds
if content from your web site is used other places. So I did it. Guess
what? A coach in Chicago, who is on my mailing list, is using my new
web site content, word for word. I am not talking just a few paragraphs
here. Almost her entire web site, her “about me” section, her coaching
programs, all of it (except for a few references to cake) is my
writing. With her photo.
My short freak out included thoughts like:
- She is stealing my hard work.
- This is not right.
- What a slimy weasel (no offense to Ryan and Emily’s new pet ferrets).
- I can’t believe this.
- How DARE she!
- Oh no she di’int! (Clearly, she did.)
Would
most of you agree that plagiarism is not right? Sure. I’ve got a thread
on Facebook to prove it. But, I knew if I wanted to feel better, I
needed to get to work and replace these thoughts that felt extremely
icky.
Thanks to my pal Jackie Gartman, this is what I came up with:
- No one can steal my work. Not really.
- My
web site copy is just a compilation of words. My real work is my truth,
my energy and my light. That comes from within and backs up what I say
on my site.
And, thanks to my new Facebook and Twitter friend Patti Digh–who had her writing plagiarized on the net and wrote a beautiful article
about it–I remembered that being authentic, and being yourself is its
own reward. It must not feel very good to need to use someone else’s
work as your own.
Now, I am sure you are wondering what is next.
What am I going to “do” about it. This is where is gets good. Because I
have cleaned up my thoughts, I can now take action from a very calm and
peaceful place. I can stand up for myself in an organized and powerful
way now that my thinking is not clouded with ick. It feels good to take
action from a clean place.
What can you do when something negative happens?
- What you are thinking about the situation?
- Does it feel good or bad? Write down the thoughts that feel bad.
Notice how you feel when you think them. There is no up side EVER to
feeling bad. There is no award for being a victim or martyr. Haven’t
you noticed?- What can you think instead that you BELIEVE and that also FEELS BETTER?
- Rinse and repeat.
I love the Byron Katie question, “Who would you be without that thought?”
I choose to continue to innovate, and not replicate.
Rock on, people!
Should We Toilet Paper Roll A Substitute Teacher’s House?
Posted on 07. Sep, 2009 by Susan in Inspiration
more time teaching our kids to ride bikes, tie their shoes, and brush their
teeth than we do the critical skill of HOW TO THINK.
I am sure
that the parochial school education that my parents worked so hard to provide
me never ever included a lesson that taught me “HEY! You get what you think
you’ll get!” And, while my
excellent college experience taught me many things, like how to cram a million
credits in during your Junior year summer so that you graduate on time, I
wasn’t ever challenged to consider that I could change my results by changing
what and how I thought about things.
So, one day
last week after school, when my usually happy and excited Emily crawled in the
car and broke down in tears, I was curious about A. what she was thinking that
created her pain, and B. how quickly I could find a culprit to blame and run
them over with my SUV. It turned out that Emily experienced a third grade
substitute teacher that was not an Emily Hyatt fan. This was a shock to her 9-year-old system and to this feisty
mama bear.
So after
letting her vent a bit, I noticed that she was not getting over it. And, I was really interested to observe
that the conversation that I was having with her was not at all unlike many
client session conversations that I have recently had. So, all revenge fantasies aside, I
wanted to share some things that I wished I had known in 3rd grade.
·
Everyone does not have to like you. Contrary to the
many messages of your upbringing, if you are nice enough, work hard enough, are
pretty enough, sweet enough, dazzling enough, etc, it will NOT make people like
you. And, further, stop trying so
hard to make sure that everyone “likes” you. Everyone will not like you. That’s just how it is. And, it’s
a good darned thing. Because when someone doesn’t like you, it just shows you
where to go (and it’s not with them.)
It helps you to be clear about WHO YOUR PEOPLE ARE. Your tribe. And, of course, your people love you
when you like yourself.
·
What are you afraid will happen if someone does not like you? This was really interesting to explore with Emily. What was her mind cooking up around
this? Not unlike my client’s fears
of becoming broke and homeless, Emily was worried that she would miss out on
special class privileges, not being called on to answer during class, and being
punished for being too chatty.
(Just for the record, being chatty is a great talent to have in the real
world, thank you very much Mrs. Substitute Teacher.) It’s not that someone does not like you; it’s what you make
that mean that causes so much pain.
Insert my favorite mantra ever here, “SO WHAT! WHO CARES?” Someone doesn’t like me? Rock on. My
tribe just got tighter.
·
Resisting what is (oh, gee,
someone does not like me, I must try to win them over) and wallowing in dirty pain about it creates a crappy mood and even more
of a crappy result.
Dwelling on what you do not want only creates more of it. So, after giving Emily the rock star
time to cry and vent and mope around the house, I asked her if she wanted me to
help her feel better, or let her moan and groan and create more drama. She wanted to feel better. Great. That is the first order of
business: Are you are willing to
let go of your painful story and do you want to feel better?
·
Decide how you want to feel. I revisited thought work with her. What thoughts could she think and
believe that would help her feel better whether or not the substitute teacher
liked her? What did she like and
appreciate about school that would get her excited about the next day (instead
of her suggestion that she skip and hang with me). I had her imagine the teacher being as mean and as nasty as
possible. Why was this so bad? She could TOTALLY hang with it. No one could
touch Thought Warrior Emily if she was marinating in kind thoughts. What did she come up with?
“I like me.” Joy.
“This is only temporary.” Relief.
“I wonder what Mrs. Substitute is thinking that makes her act that
way?” Compassion.
If only I
knew this material when I thought my only recourse was to toilet paper roll
nasty teacher’s houses. Oops.
Living and Dying
Posted on 16. Aug, 2009 by Susan in Inspiration
afraid to die. This realization
hit me reading a great book by Gene O’Kelly called Chasing Daylight, How My Forthcoming Death Transformed My Life. The author was diagnosed with a
terminal brain tumor and writes this little gem during the last 90 days of his
life. It is a memoir about a
successful man who at the moment of discovering he is dying, decides to live.
O’Kelly
writes about living in the present moment for his final 90 days. He noticed the simplest things that he
had been too busy to observe climbing the corporate ladder: a bird flying in
the sky, the sound of water in a stream, real conversations with people that he
loved. He called these times
“perfect moments.”
The concept
of a Perfect Moment and O’Kelly’s story struck a chord with me. Being in the present moment can be
tricky for me. I’m someone who
doesn’t care much about the past, but I’ll invest buckets of time in the
future. Ideas and plans excite me.
And, sometimes, I’ll plan to the extent that I miss the fun right in
front of me. I work on this. Daily.
I decided
after reading Chasing Daylight, that I would take a new approach to staying in
the present moment and created a simple coaching tool by the same name in honor
of the author.
Create A
Perfect Moment
1. Stop-Once an hour, be intentional and stop what you are doing.
2. Breathe-Take three or more deep breathes.
3. Observe-Look around at what is happening in your surroundings and
find something to appreciate for 60 seconds.
4. Gratitude-Marinate in what you are appreciating. Really see it, smell it, hear it, taste
it.
Isn’t that
fun? Here’s what I’ve
noticed. Perfect Moments are
happening all of the time. You
just have to take off your busy glasses and open your perfect moment eyes to
see them. Brushing my daughter’s
hair. Watching my crazy beagles
wrestle. Really tasting a
delicious slice of strawberry pie.
Laughing at the crazy fat squirrel that barks at me all the time. These are perfect moments.
Living
this way, drinking in all that this life has to offer, keeps me centered
in a way that does not allow a fear of living or dying to have a place in me.
Get The Book!
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